It has been awhile since I could sit down at the computer for any amount of time! It is strange to have my blog go un-updated for so many days! This week will be no better because I'm taking the boys camping to distract them from daddy's absence. This past week was a frantic flurry of 'to dos' and 'to remembers' and 'to packs' and 'to launders' ...Brent and I celebrated our 5th anniversary on Friday (so thankful we were able to spend this together before Brent left)!! What a lifetime we've packed into five years, and still it's always 'team Vose' with lots of softness and acceptance, and remarkably little conflict! I'm very thankful.
To celebrate we took off for 2 nights to Whistler, where we spent part of our honeymoon. We had tons of fun! We rented mountain bikes and bombed around some trails! I realized that although I have wanted to own a bicycle for years, it has actually been 9 YEARS since I rode one!! How time flies! It is true that once you learn to ride a bicycle you never forget, because I hopped on and didn't fall once. I had some scrapes from the pedals, and I was muddy from head to toe including glasses and hair because it had rained the night before. Brent avoided the puddles, but I relished them! Now I really need a bicycle. I had forgotten how fun it is to ride! I will include pix of our time in Whistler when I have a chance. We ate a TON of delicious, expensive food and enjoyed the scenery immensely. We had one 2 sentence spat regarding me watching Dr. Phil...what holiday is complete without a moment of petty spatting?! Don't worry, I put Brent in his place. Ha ha.
We returned Saturday morning to a messy house and the daunting task of getting Brent out the door in less than 18 hours with everything he may need for the next 6 months. This morning we woke earlier than the kids (novel!) to get things organized to leave by 7:00. We spent an hour at the airport, Ayden and I genuinely weepy and Matthew acting up a STORM wailing and flailing his body around, but really not that genuine. He's a drama queen. There was not a single real tear regarding Brent's departure, though there may have been one or two regarding the non sharing of candy. I mock him (lovingly), but he is simply too young to understand exactly what happened this morning! As far as he is concerned, next week is as far away as next year, and daddy has travelled for work before. Here's praying he will deal well with Brent's absence and not be shaken to his core as far as the security of his attachments...I pray he knows his daddy loves him and is coming back even though the wait seems interminable to his little two year old mind.
The boys enjoyed watching Brent's airplane arrive, unload, and load back up again, and they yelled and waved for a long, long time after Brent had gone through security! :)
It feels surreal to be alone. Christmas seems a lifetime away. A friend at church asked me, "So, when does Brent leave?" this morning, and I just started to cry. After that I was okay~I was generally worried I would be a weeping snotty mess in church since opening up to God generally brings up all that messiness, but I didn't want to quite open up that messily, that publicly, just yet. I held it together for the rest of the service.
Ayden had requested lunch at Tim Horton's so we pulled in there after church, where the boys promptly tag teamed me. Ayden's order: Yes bagel, no bagel, just donut, not allowed donut?, wailing, okay bagel with strawberry cream cheese. Matthew's order immediately following: No bagel, donut, donut, donut, WHY no donut?, wailing, donut, donut, donut?, okay bagel with srawberry cream cheese. Apple juice.
I bought a cinnamon bun for them to share for dessert.
Ayden's lunch conversation: No bagel, don't want bagel, hate bagels, didn't order bagel, only want cinnamon bun. Hate bagels. Want only water, apple juice, and cinnamon bun. WAILING. WAILING. WAILING. Finally mommy has had enough and takes him out to the car for a time out.
I come back from the car time out deal, and Matthew is pinching icing from the top of the cinnamon bun. Bagel untouched.
Matthew's lunch conversation: WHY bagel?, no bagel, yucky bagel, bun?, WHY NO BUN?!, NO! NO!
"MOMMY I HAVE TO GO PEE!!!" so we rush off to the bathroom, where he takes one look at the toilet and says, "No, I don't have to pee anymore."
So we go back to the table, where Matthew is again pinching icing from the cinnamon bun. Bagel still untouched.
Mommy's chili is stone cold by now, and mommy is sweating.
I finally convince Ayden to eat the cream cheese off his bagel and he quiets down.
"MOMMY, PEE!!!" I am not joking, all of this is true. Matthew at least does actually pee.
In the end, both boys eat 1/2 bagel and no cinnamon bun, because they are tired and want to go home. Guess what? I don't care. I throw the bun in the garbage and go home.
I would like to pride myself with the fact that NOT ONCE through this hour long tag team escapade did I raise my voice or get angry. I have my good moments!
As far as the "jealousy" part of my title, this one is for my friend Louise. To console me in my husbandless state, my friend bought me and her tickets to the LIVE TOUR OF SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! November 11th!! In Washington!!!!!!!!! They sold out in 2 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is me slightly excited to see a live version of my favourite show: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
This was a nice pick me up on a hard day.
Thank you Wyville!!
I appreciate your prayers and support! It really is miraculous how I've been carried thus far. xo.