Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Cranky


Argh. Some days you just wake up on the WRONG SIDE OF THE BED, you know? Today is one of those days. I don't know why, but I'm cranky.
Actually, I DO know why--I have a sore throat and slept only 6 hours and spent my entire morning corralling two children in non kid friendly spaces [Dana knows exACtly what I'm talking about, being the involuntary doctor-visiting-queen--dontcha, babe?]. So I guess I've got some right to feel a little cranky. I'm keeping it inside pretty well, but I'm getting to the point where if I don't change that inside voice it's going to start spilling over...

So this a.m. I felt pretty terrible, but Matthew had to miss a much-anticipated field trip with his kindergarten class to go to a pediatric Ear-Nose-Throat specialist in Surrey. So right off the bat I feel awful this morning. He took it fairly well, but I still felt bad. I made Brent tell him, because I just didn't want to see his disappointed face. :(
So we drove Ayden to school, and then drove straight to the appointment. On the up side, I was not nervous about this appointment at ALL, contrary to my regular M.O. I had all the ingredients for tying myself all up in knots: I feel supremely responsible for his current medical state, which means that I made some mistakes as his mom, which becomes public in the context of a doctor's office. Public to a professional who can judge me. And will. It is also a new office, a new doctor, in a new location, and the time is tight if I want to get there on time. I'm not fully organized because Riley is still not dressed and still in his overnight diaper, because I pulled him directly from bed and put him in the car.
These are not necessarily awful things, but they are things which would normally add up to a pretty big anxiety issue for me on the way to a medical appointment.
BUT THEY DIDN"T!
What a relief!
Anyways, I drove out there, found the place, 'surprise!' pay for parking (this is unusual at dr's offices around here) at one of those parking meters that only takes a specific type of coin and OMG thank you JESUS, I actually HAVE THAT COIN. Holy jeepers. What pay parking lot doesn't take credit cards these days? We found it, Matthew peed his pants, I took him to the (locked, down the hall--I hate those types of buildings) bathroom, we went back and filled out a bajillion forms, we had the appointment, Riley shit his diaper and it stunk, the doc wasn't that good with kids but was good with ME--if you can't have one it's nice to have another, but why go into peds if you don't know how to interact with kids? Matthew is VERY easy to engage--Matthew peed his pants again and we went to the locked down the hall bathroom again, I filled out MORE forms, and he's going for surgery to have tubes put in his ears to prevent his chronic fluid buildup and/or ear infections and subsequent hearing loss and speech regressions.
I'm just glad he is a part of our family and lives in Canada where you can have access to help like surgery and pathology when you need it. Rich or poor.

So Riley's still running around with shitty pants because there is nowhere for me to change him. So we go down to the van and I change him there. The advantage to van diaper changes is that there is lots of space, you know it's clean or at least your own family's dirt, you generally have enough extra supplies stuffed in drawers or cupboards or under seats, and no one will pester you for the bathroom. The disadvantage is that you usually have to drive around with poo in your car for the next few hours until you find a garbage or get home. We did the latter.

We then drove to an x-ray lab in Langley, waited an interminable amount of time while the receptionist sorted out what Matthew's legal name is and where we live, in a waiting room with no toys. Then we went to a different waiting room and waited an equally interminable amount of time for Matthew to be called, on a bench in the hallway where there were no toys. Riley decided to play with my keys, and stuck them up his nose.
Fortunately they came out again. I guess we would have been in the right place if he'd needed an x ray...

They took the x-ray and then we went to our regular doctor to drop off a form and make a pre surgical appointment, all related to the ENT situation. There were toys, but we didn't stay long enough to play with them. So both kids were crying when we left that office. And I wanted to stick my fingers in my eyes and call it a day!!!

Jeepers!

But seriously, in NONE of this was I anxious. Tired, yes. Cranky, yes, but inside. I survived! And now blogging about it has helped me to get it out and I feel way less cranky. Which is good because I'm going solo full tilt until after bedtime tonight....

5 comments:

Rachel Clear said...

Damn, girl. You are totally gangsta, the way you handled all that stuff at once without losing your cool.

The peeing of the pants would have done me in all on its own. I love how you mentioned it so casually, like no biggie, and you were probably all prepared with extra clothes and everything for him.

You are awesome.

Asheya said...

Wow, you handled so much today! Offices with no toys are definitely not cool, and cooped up little boys are not fun to deal with. Ouch on the keys--glad that Riley is okay. And so great that you did not feel anxious!

So glad to hear that you are on the way to some solutions for Matthew.

I concur with Rachel--you are awesome.

Dana said...

You rock. Seriously. I have managed to rope my parents into childcare and/or one or both big kids is at school for almost every appointment we have for Josh. And Josh isn't in the keys-up-the-nose stage OR the stinky poo stage yet. (Micah apparently is though- after I got him to blow the grain of rice out of his nostril he mused aloud that perhaps a pea would be a better selection, and even initiated launch sequence before I stopped him).

Anyway, way to push through and even emerge with your sanity more or less intact.

I am sure you have pursued all avenues, but just in case, I wanted to mention that apparently chiropractic care can help with chronic ear infections; enough that tubes aren't needed. I hope and pray that Matthew can find relief and healing!

nancy said...

what a gross day. Matthew is getting the help he needs in all aspects of his life. Dad and I were talking today about what a well adjusted gutsy little guy he is with qualities that will take him far in life. You are nurturing this. Without the ability to see into the future (which God decided we can't have!) all parents are winging it right?
You are Wonder Woman and an fantastic mom to all 3 of my amazing grandsons.
By the way, I found a note addressed to me from Ayden today - tell him thanks!
love you
mom

Tonya said...

That's enough to make anyone cranky - even someone who had enough sleep and didn't have a sore throat. He peed his pants twice? Riley pooped? Argh. I'm getting cranky just thinking about it!!!