Thursday, May 27, 2010

My mornings these days

My kids are very very distractible. We get up around 7:20 and leave the house at 8:10. From 7:20 until 8:00 this is my morning refrain, and I do not exaggerate. In fact, I edit by about 38 minutes. This is me:

Good morning, Matthew. Please do your three morning jobs.
Ayden, get up please.
Ayden, it's time to get up.
Ayden, you need to get up now if you want to earn a dot on your chart for getting up on time.
Get up now if you want to have time to ride your bike to school.
AYDEN. GET. UP.
Matthew, why are you still standing there in your pyjamas? Go to the bathroom, brush your teeth, and get dressed.
AYDEN. GET OUT OF BED NOW. NO DOT.
Okay, Riley. Time to change your diaper. Matthew, please unlock the door.
No, you don't need privacy, I can hear your toothbrush. Open the door.
AYDEN GET UP OFF THE FLOOR. Thank you. Take off your clothes. Matthew, please open the door.
Riley, come back! Time to change your diaper! Matthew, did you pee? Can you do that now, please? Thank you.
Riley, stop kicking. Gentle please.
MATTHEW. PEE. NOW. When you're finished, get dressed.
AYDEN. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GET UP OFF THE FLOOR AND TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES!
Riley, time to get dressed.
Ayden.
Matthew.
Simon.
WhateveryournameisgetoverherebeforeIeatyouforbreakfast. Riley! Stop kicking! Gentle.
Ayden, did you go to the bathroom yet? Please do that!
Matthew?
Matthew?
What are you doing? Did you pee yet? WHY NOT? Oh my GOODNESS, people.
STOP kicking me!
Okay, Matthew, time to put your clothes on.
Ayden, GET DRESSED. And please hurry, if you want to have time to ride your bikes to school, otherwise we will have to drive.
..........

And it continues from downstairs, where I let the dog out, feed him, let him out to pee, and get breakfast for everybody, while yelling up the stairs at either both older boys, or just Ayden for sure. Oh my GOODNESS that child has LEAD IN HIS ASS, people.

And then after breakfast it's, "Get your shoes on. Put on your shoes, please. Shoes. Put on your SHOES! Not flip flops, you have to wear running shoes if you want to ride your bikes. Please put on your shoes. Shoes. Matthew, get out of the closet. Then go get some socks!! Jeepers!! Socks, people. Put on some socks.
Okay, please put on a sweater because it's still kind of cold out. Sweaters, please! Sweaters! Lets wear sweaters!

While tripping over the dog.

Did I sign up for this? I don't remember signing a fully informed consent for this procedure.
This repetitive morning scenario.
Everyone says to cherish it. Treasure it. Hang on to it, because it's gone in a heartbeat.
Sigh.

4 comments:

Louise Chapman said...

I am not looking forward to the day when we have to get Kai to school each morning...I love that we can be in our pj's until 9am if we want! I love the commentary with Matthew:)

Dana said...

I can hear it. I can see it. I can relate. :)

Rachel Clear said...

Um: Aaaaaaaaaaaack!

This is why having an older daughter FIRST would be nice, don't ya think? A somewhat bossier type of daughter who wants to practice her mothering skills? This scenario is exactly why I kind of hoped for a girl first. But I think I'm in for what you're experiencing! :)

Asheya said...

Ha ha informed consent. There is definitely not full disclosure before becoming a parent!