Tuesday, January 11, 2011

It seems like everyone I follow online is having a home birth.
I'm happy for them! Sad for me.

Thanks for the moving day wishes! We got the keys early and went over tonight to show the kids before we actually move. It was fun! It's odd, too; it still feels totally like someone else's house! But we LOVE IT!

I'm pretty bummed when I look in the bathroom and think, I'm not giving birth here. =(
I was okay with this yesterday! Please pray for me, I know what the right decision is and I need to follow that regardless of my feelings of loss. It's about more than home birth, right? Can you bolster me up with stories of beautiful hospital births?


Carol said...

No matter where you give birth, the most important part is meeting & holding your beautiful baby at the end!

ms emili louann said...

You will have a magnificent birth, whether at home, at the hospital... in the car on the way to the hospital (you never know :)

You have an incredibly supportive midwife, husband, family, friends. YOU are a STRONG and BEAUTIFUL WOMAN who is confident in her body, and that is crucial.

I have many friends who have all hospital births, and their stories are just as lovely and compelling. My friend Mary especially, who is on her fourth child and who has "naturaled-it" every time, is such an inspiration. My sisters have all had empowering hospital births. I have another friend who is expecting to deliver in a hospital, with a midwife and doula. She is going to rock it, I'm sure.

As will you, my dear. You've done this before - you will have a kick-ass birth because you know in your bones you can.

OOOOOh! I love you! I am committing these to prayer for you: peace, unbridled joy, strength, a beautiful and empowering birth. Claim it, lady.

Tonya said...

I've had 3 hospital births and 2 birthing center births. Funny, my girls were all hospital births! Abigail's was with an OB - great experience. Things went well, no interventions at all, I went home 18 hours later. Rebekah's was QUICK. I got there and she was born before they even checked me, the midwife was still filling out paperwork. Again, no interventions and we left 18 hours later. (Both girls were born around 11 p.m., so 18 hours later was around noon the next day.) Liza's was the BEST birth experience ever. I had my midwife, my sister doula and the nurse with me the entire time, supporting me and loving me. My kids were in the room watching Gilligan's Island on a little DVD player. The girls were there when Liza was born, the boys came in right after (oh, my niece was there too). The midwife showed my kids the placenta, even let them put gloves on and touch it.

We've had the siblings at all the other births. Actually, Abigail didn't make it to Beka's birth, she came about 15 minutes later. I still remember Abigail jumping on a chair in the room at about 2 a.m. after Beka was born!!! I've had wonderful experiences in the hospital. NO interventions, no issues with rooming in, no one demanding we do things we didn't want to after the baby was born.

Caryn Ouwehand said...

Mel... just keep following my blog for the next little while, I promise I won't be having a home birth in the next 8 weeks.

Just like Ayden, Matthew, and Riley have unique birth stories... this baby will too, no matter where she arrives. Oops, did I say she? I meant she... Damn, I did it again.

nancy said...

You know I really wanted you to experience a birth at home, you little hippie mom! BUT... I pray for,and really believe, that where ever the location, it will be a holy, God filled environment for you and your family to welcome this oh so sweet new little life.
(hows that for a run-on sentence?)
unless you deliver very early/late, I'll be there to help ensure You are supported in reaching your birthing goals.
Hope you're surviving your snow storm moving day!
Can't wait to see your new house!
love you always and forever

sara said...

I had beautiful, natural hospital deliveries that I am totally satisfied with (one with insulin dependent diabetes). You can have a hospital birth still on your terms and also keeping you and baby safe. Balance, babe, it's all about the balance.

tamie said...

Hey sweet dear friend. Take heart! Many good things happen in hospitals, and I'm not just stopping about the fact that hospitals can save trauma. Hospitals can also be places of deep connection, of quiet, of joy. I once saw photographs of a woman giving birth in the hospital, and she was in many different positions, just letting the spirit lead her, as it were, and the doctor was there cheerleading her, not interfering in any way.

I think that it makes a lot of sense that this would be a thing of grief and loss for you. So do make sure to grieve and experience the loss for what it is.

And then, find ways to move forward to the goodness that is to come!

Asheya said...

So many people have already said all the things I would say to you. You are confident, you know yourself and what you want, you are surrounding yourself with amazing support people.

Also keep in mind that you are going to be in the hospital for a specific reason, and that is because there is an indication that you or the baby may require immediate medical care that would be outside of the expertise of a midwife at home. I know you know this, but it can be good to revisit the concept that you are not going to the hospital because everything looks completely healthy for you and the baby, but because there is an indication that a complication could arise. In which case, you will be very thankful you are there.

And, I also very strongly believe in your ability to have a normal, natural, physiological, beautiful, untraumatic, intervention free birth if all is well with you and the baby.

I agree with Tamie that grieving the loss of a homebirth is very important, and I would also add that I think it's important that you somehow learn to embrace the hospital. Fear and negative feelings of being at the hospital will make it harder for you to allow yourself to let go and be there and in the birth, letting your body do what it needs to do.

Be confident in your ability and the ability of your support people to help you and your baby have the things in birth that are important to you, no matter what the circumstances. You know that keeping your baby with you even in an emergency is very important, and I don't think you will let anyone tell you what to do! You are educating yourself on what interventions might be suggested and when it would be appropriate to refuse or accept them.

I can imagine your disappointment, and I'm saying all these things because if I had had to go to the hospital with Amadeus I think I would have wanted someone to say similar things to me :) Lots of love to you, dear friend.

Dana said...

I was very satisfied with both my hospital births. My midwives were so gentle with my babies and with me, I got perfect privacy and room to move, felt amazingly supported, my babies never left my sight and nothing was done to them without my consent. Your team knows what you want and you are all prepared. AND, God has got your back. Jesus will be there too, He is part of your support team. He can be trusted.